Archive for the Category ◊ Baby, Baby, Baby ◊

07 Sep 2006 Oh Cadence, Cadence. Where for art thou Cadence…
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1 week and 1 day to go until my due date and I’m now officially tired of being pregnant and totally impatient. It’s time. It’s past time. I’ve been pregnant forever. I feel like a moose. or a whale. Or a manatee (a sea cow!). Something large and clumsy that has trouble rolling over in bed. I’m restless, anxious and antsy. I feel like pacing all the time, and yet can’t get interested in any task.

Eric starts paternity leave next week. I’m nervous that we’re going to waste a whole week of leave with no baby.

I did finish the moses basket. It was a nightmare…

The lining was too big in some places and too small in others. I ended up stitched the lining to the basket to make sure it wasn’t too bulk inside and didn’t smother the baby. I got stuck by pins and needles so many times working on that, but it’s pretty and just what I wanted. The ribbon matches Cadence’s coming home outfit and I’ll be using it on her birth announcements too.

Here’s a close-up of the nursery rhyme toile. I adore it.

Jack however, isn’t interested baskets or toile..waiting or dates.

12 Jul 2006 Medical Care-My Thoughts…
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Today, I was off to the OB again. I dodged the bullet and didn’t have to have a pelvic exam (Emily and I were both happy about that, she because she’d have to leave the room while the doctor checked my “parts” and me because I just don’t like the damn things). Since i have no risk for pre-term labor, the OB didn’t think checking me was necessary.

But Cadence continues to grow like a weed and that means another ultrasound in 5 to 6 weeks.

Anyway, I’m thinking at some point induction due to Cadence’s size may be discussed. I told Eric I’m actually expecting it, but then again, Iv’e been a bit of a negative nelly in regards to the pregnancy and have been waiting for that THING that’s going to happen to make me unhappy.

Shall we recap–Early monitoring due to an ectopic and light spotting. First ultrasound, mean ass tech about killed me with the probe and was very curt in regards to the lack of sack. Grrrrrrrrrreat. Numerous blood draws culminating in an ultrasound that showed the sack in the right place.

Move to IL. Find a new provider. Have another ultrasound. All is well.

Show up for my something week ultrasound, placenta is low. Worry and fret until 2 weeks ago when another scan showed a healthy, but big, Cadence and a moved placenta. Cervix is soft. Worry about pre-term labor.

Show up today, fears about pre-term labor erased, high blood pressure (no concern yet), baby still large, schedule another ultrasound.

Yeah, there have been a lot of ups and downs. I mentioned to Eric that the little bird that nags me inside of my head is muttering about induction due to size. No one has mentioned it, but it’s there. Settling around me like a cloak.

Honestly, if my body and Cadence are ready, the idea of a planned induction really doesn’t bother me. But that’s despite that point.

Generally, I don’t distrust the medical system. I pick doctors I feel like I jive with, that I get a good feeling from and who understand my philosophy. It’s also helpful if they don’t treat me like an idiot (veddy helpful). I believe strongly in finding a doctor whose ideals and outlook suit your own and putting your trust in them. Of course, you should question things if something doesnt’ jive, and I’ve done that in the past and over the course of this pregnancy with Cadence. I declined an intensive ultrasound based on the information that the issues in my and Eric’s genetic makeup that would necessitate further testing wouldn’t show on an ultrasound at all. And, if induction is suggested for Cadence, we’ll be taking some time to research and talk before agreeing to it blindly (but you can bet your ass Eric will be at the ultrasound appt. with me because he’s firmer than I am).

I generally believe in the good in people. I just do. It’s probably a big downfall, but so far it hasn’t steered me wrong. I believe that the doctors I have chosen are making the best decisions they can in regards to the care of their patients and thereby me. Of course I seek second opinions. Of course I do research, but at the end of the day, I didn’t go to medical school. And reading medical journals bores the shit out of me. So, I find people I like and trust, people I feel as though are honest and non-patronizing and I put my trust in them until they show me I shouldn’t.

I am not a conspiracy theorist. It’s just not in me. It’s genetic, I think.

26 Jun 2006 The Cadence Files-Third Edition
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Today was my fifth ultrasound. Four more than I had with Emily and two more than my OB practice actually gives routinely. Thankfully, this ultrasound will act in place of my 32 week ultrasound, so hopefully this is the last one.

The news, IMO, was mixed this appt. My placenta has moved up into a safe position, which is great news. Cadence is growing well and doing great.

My blood pressure has gone up some, which is a little concerning to me (I’ve always had low blood pressure), but is not a concernt to the doctor.

The mixed news, is that due to my braxton hicks and pressure, Doc did an internal and my cervix is soft. It’s not uncommon, but I’m to come back in two weeks to check to see if its progressed any.

What all of this means will remain to be seen, of course.

Developmentally, Cadence is measuring 2 weeks ahead, growth wise. THe doctor estimates she may weigh as much as 8 lbs. According to developmental sites, she’s now capable of breathing, should she be born. She’s growing hair and has eyelashes and eyebrows and she’s gaining body fat. Weight wise, she’s probably nearly three pounds now, based on her 2 weeks ahead estimate. Her chance if survival, if born now, is very good. 92%. Of course, we’d like Cadence to cook a good while longer.

Cadence says, right on!

08 Mar 2006 Pregnancy is often a series of indignities….
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and I won’t even mention the fact that over the next nine moiths that numerous strangers will get a bird’s eye view of my girl parts. That’s not really an indigniy, particularly after the deliver where you’d probably drop trou and show your hoohah to a strager if they asked how you were healing or to see your stiches.

No, I’m talking about the other things. I’m talking about my loogie problem and the gag reflex.

I have a couple of different issues

1) The Gags or the Heaves:

I have these bad. It doesn’t mean I’m going tot throw up OR that I throw up much or often, I’m just racked by the heaves. One day, I will throw up somewhere I wish I wouldn’t–in bed or on the kitchen floor–but for now, I walk around the house clapping my hand over my mouth while I stiffle a body doubling heave.

I heave bad enough to actually gross Emily out. I heave bad enough to make Eric go “What did you just do.”

I do my best not to heave in public, but yesterday I heaved over the bushes as Emily’s bus was pulling down the street. I hope no neighbors saw me. ;o)

2) The Loogie Issue

Loogies. Loogies are gross. I have a major Loogie problem. I have nasal allergies. So do my siblings. We sniffle and snort and have runny noses most of the year. I’ve dealt with post nasal drip most of my life. But right now, my post nasal drip and I aren’t gettig along which is where the loogies are coming in. I’m spitting like a school aged boy, every chance I get.

I open the door of the car and spit at intersections. I spit out of rolled down windows. I spit in the shower. I spit into the toilet. I’ve spit into the garbage can and I was over the bushes yesterday when I heaved because I was spiting in them.

I remember when my brother was in the spitting stage he actually spit on my parent’s kithcen floor. I can understand now why he might have done that. I’ve spit into tissues. I’ve opened the front door and spit outside.

I’m not a spitter, folks. I’m not a girlie girl, but I’m not a spitter. I can’t roll my tounge (although my parents AND siblings (and husband) can all roll their tounges, but that’s another post about the oddness of genetics and i am actually biolgically related to them) so actually getting some leverage to something I’m spitting pretty much alludes me, but I can’t seem to let my post nasal drip drain, so I’m spitting it out.

Gross, huh?

Add to all of this the fact that pregnancy gives me gas and soon my breasts may leak and you get why I say it’s a series of indiginities. Nothing I’d change, but still

04 Mar 2006 heartbeat heard-Huge sigh of relief…
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As metioned, my unstrustworthy body has had me rather anxious about our OB appt. today. We waited a good 20 minutes for the doctor(even though we had an early mornig, first thing appt.) The doctor reassured us that she may not be able to find the heartbeat via doppler and if she couldn’t it was no biggie, we’d just have a quick ultrasound.

She started scanning on my right side, whereby I know no zygote resides. He/she can’t have come out of the right tube. It’s impossible. She wanded over to the left and there it was. Faint firsatt and then louder 169 lovely beats per minute.

So, we went to Eric’s mom’s house and told Emily that Mommy was going to have annother baby. Emily was noncommital, laughing nervously and then refusing to discuss the issue with my parents. She’s made some comments about her shopping and some commets about things she could give the baby. She’s been pointing out matter of factly, that, the baby is making me sick/tired/ill/cranky to which I’ve been agreeig. We have six long months to get her used to the idea. Hopefully we will.

28 Feb 2006 Confessional Tuesday
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The cat is now offically out of the bag. As of this week, I am 12 weeks pregnant with our second child. We go this Saturday to hopefully hear this little one’s heartbeat. I’ve been worried and anxious, (no big surprise condsidering both my personality and the unfortunate circumstance of our last pregnancy) but I’m sick as a dog so I hope that’s good proof hat the baby is growing and thriving. We dub it “The Parasite” at this stage is leaches water and minerals out of my body for its own use. We really do think more highly of this little one than that, but that Eric and I (and our sense of humor) for you.

Admittedly, the pregnancy seemed to have not come at a worse time logistically. Let’s run through the time line.

Chrismas 2005-Concieve Baby (yes, a Christmas baby in its own way minus the annoying holiday birthdate)

January 1 2006-My self imposed “I promise I’ll move quickly if you just give me unil this date to enjoy the holidays)

January 7th- S-u-s-p-e-c-t somehing is going on with my reproducive system. Mention to Eric that we may need to Buy a Test. He agrees and asks that I don’t use it until Monday. I suggest Sunday because I want to take the test with him there. He suggests a bottle of wine. I suggest that I can’t drink until we know the result of the test. He agrees to the test on Saturday.


January 9th-Call my OB as my early pregnancy needs careful monitering to rule out another ectopic. Make an appt. for Jan 11th.

Jan 11th-Space out and miss my firsts OB appt.

Jan 13th-Have OB appt, including a plevic, a beta blood draw and the World’s Most Uncomfortable Transvaginal Ultrasound. Seriously folks. I nearly cried. Nothing conclusive, but at not quite five weeks, that’s not uncommon

Jan 15th-Go to the E.R. on a playoff Sunday to have another beta HCG draw done.

Jan 17th-Go back to the hospial for another Transvaginal Ultrasound (this one more comfortable with a kinder tech and the squeezy hand of my hubby) and another blood draw. This time the gestational sac is visabile. Dr. M. says my numbers are going up well.

Jan 20th-Dr. M. is pleased and says I am now considered a normal pregnancy. Baby looks good for its age and my numbers are apporpriate.

Jan 21st-Move to IL.

February 6th-First OB appt. in IL. Have ANOTHER Transvaginal ultrasound. Baby is measuring a little small, but its heart is beating strong.

Over the last few weeks we’ve had plenty of sickness and soreness and this Saturday we roll back o the dr. for our 12 week appt to hopefully hear this litle one’s heartbeat. If all goes well on Saturday, we’ll tell Emily that she’s going to be a big sister. We think it’s time. It will be a long wait. My previous therapist suggested waiting some time, but I’m not sure. I think we need to spend time involving Emily and I’m afraid she’ll be resentful of a secret kept from her too long.

She’s like me.

So MUCH like me.

It’s going to talk a lot o make sure our sensitive, spirited girl knows that se’ll always be a princess in this household, no matter what happens in life and I want to make sure we have ample time to reassure her.

Plus, she’s probably wondering why the hell I’m throwing up six times a day. ;o)

That’s my confession. The secret I’ve been keeping. :o)